Blur or Stupid??

When can I stop feeling blur n get to noe the stupid ntu system better?? I’m always missing out on tings.. wat happen to me?? I wan to stop living so being like tat… I’m gg to open my eyes n ears n observed wat’s ard me.. n y cant the system be more easy to understand.. I’m angry 4 being blur n angry wif ntu 4 making me confused.. I simply missed the spoon filling daes of sp.. I don’t have to worry abt aniting cos everyting is being planned by the sch.. I jus need to make sure I studied 4 my quizzes n examz.. n of cos, no worries of failing cos the tips the lecturer gave r super obvious.. can someone give me so medicine to wake me up? Frm whatever place my mind have gone to?? Or whoever who steal my brain pls return to me.. i tink I sound like I’m mad…